The Science Of Long Distance Relationships…
Often times we find ourselves in situations that subjects us to a world of turmoil all because we never envisioned our reality taking such form. We get thrown off our balance so hard, it takes forever to regain our footing, yeah I know all about that, I’ve had my fair share of upsets so take it from me when I tell you there are ways to live unscathed through such moments.
These life upsets are heavily present in romantic relationships where one or both partners are thrown into a limbo by some unplanned unforeseen situation like SEPERATION BY DISTANCE, which we’d be discussing today.
SEPERATION BY DISTANCE (SBD) could be further explained as a situation where providence separates partners by taking one to a farther location from their significant other which further translate to “LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS”.
This situation is one prominent cause of break ups in Modern day relationships as physical touch and close proximity seems to be the pillar most modern relationships are leaning on so it becomes an unsavoury situation where one partner is detached from the other for whatever reasons.
Does it always have to be a sordid experience? Does gloom have to walk akimbo with the announcement of DISTANCE? If you ask me, NO, absolutely not. Now the question is, How does one bypass its challenges? Well good thing you have me as I’d be guiding you with “CIA”, THE 3 DO’s OF LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIPS;
COMMUNICATION:
As humans, communication is a huge part of our survival and continued existence, imagine a world where no one has the faintest idea on how to relate with another, everyone’s just dumbfounded wondering what every other person could be plotting in their heads, chaos, chaos, absolute chaos is what’s to happen if such was the case.
Now relate that to a romantic relationship where there is no solid or no communication at all, both partners would be subdued to a world of guess games and mind games, a total toxic environment where both partners are left with nothing but their subconscious to play tricks with them further resulting to creation of faux realities where insecurity breeds.
A couple could live together under one roof and still feel thousand miles apart from each other once their communication is lacking, it’s not a matter of how close but a matter of how solid the communication is but most couples fail to come to terms with this very fact, they’d rather live in a delusion where material satisfaction and physical touch propels the longevity of their relationships but sadly, delusions never last.
So the whole point of this very point is, regardless of the distance or proximity, Any relationship that upholds the importance of communication would find it much easy to keep its solid state from being liquified.
IMPROVISATION:
In a world ridden with daily emergence of new tech, it would be a shame for one to hold the failure of their relationship to the absence of proximity, no! miss me with that bull crap.
What’s your excuse when lovers in the Middle Ages were left with nothing but pen and paper to reach out to their far away lovers, what says you when people who had no Imessage, FaceTime, WhatsApp, Snapchat still found a way to stay abreast with their lovers.
Oh yes of course you can’t cuddle them through your gorilla amoled 5 inch screen but you do know you can strip tease on FaceTime, get in bed, talk endlessly while you watch each other creep slowly into La La Land or is that too mushy for you? Shush, it’s not, you’re just painfully boring and archaic but this is your window to change.
We live in a world filled with innovations so there’s no excuse as to why you should put your kinky on hold because your partner is in the middle of rescuing hostages in Afghanistan while you’re stuck in a condo in Silicon Valley, all you need do is to make a move and quit being so conventional, IMPROVISE!!!.
ADAPTATION:
Adaptation which is also a key human quality could be regarded as the ability to adjust to several conditions and situations engineered by nature.
No human alive can survive without adaptation skills because as the saying goes, no one knows tomorrow, for all we know, Snow could fall in northern Nigeria tomorrow and it’d be hell for the residents that have never had real life contact with a single Snow flake but could that be the end for them? Definitely not because regardless of the situation, an average human is bound to adapt for survival.
Now why not adapt this same ideology to relationships, why throw a tantrum when life throws your love dynamics off its usual balance, why resurrect your pessimism as opposed to resurrecting your buried adaptation instincts, your romance is not dead because your partner was posted to Maiduguri
Though I can’t assure their safety, you know, never mind, But yeah, the point is, Your romance won’t die if you resuscitate it by switching your routine to suit the new reality life has succeeded in subjecting you to, it’s not a walk in the park of course but hey, it doesn’t have to be a chore as well.
In Conclusion, Distance is never the end of a relationship if both partners are serious about bridging the gap between them by COMMUNICATING, IMPROVISING and ADAPTING so i hope with this few points of mine, I have been able to convince and not confuse you that you have no EXCUSE!!!
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